I still like hotdog. I still sing '90s songs. I still use warm water in bath. I am still left handed.
The word still is often unnoticed.
Tonight, while listening to a song that I am still playing right now, the word "still" became a big word.
There is still hope. This means that hope never left. It is there though maybe hidden somewhere. It can be found because it didn't disappear. Hope is still there.
I still love you. Love never departed. Love is there. When God whispered, "I still love you", it means that God never did not love us. His love for us didn't disappear like smoke.Still. It remains unchanged.
Friday, February 15, 2013
Monday, February 11, 2013
The Last Piece of Timtam
Last Saturday, I cried. I cried after months of tearless cheeks. I realized that the reason why I was too lazy to do my quiet time with God, why I stopped really praying and believing in the goodness of the Lord, why I felt tired and disconnected, is because I was bitter at God. I was bitter at Him for putting me in situations or places where I do not like. I thought, "Ok God..I can understand that You don't place me where I want, but to put me where I don't want? That's not fair". I didn't realize the bitterness grew and blocked my view of God and distorted my perspective of Him. The God that became in my head was far from the real God I knew when I was a child, far from the God in the Bible
Last Saturday, realizing that I became bitter somehow freed me. I became honest to God of how I have been feeling, knowing He understood and will always understand. Besides, He knows my heart. He knows me more than I know myself. He sees every corner of my heart but His love remains unchanged. I was scared to be honest with God thinking He'll love me less or leave me alone but that's not God, that's not His character.
And so, God used my discipler to encourage me. God is creative, He used the last piece of TimTam
The last piece of TimTam was at the other end. Being Filipinos, we like to leave the last piece. We don't usually eat the last piece unless prodded. But what's the difference of the last piece of TimtTm with the rest? Nothing. It tastes the same, looks the same, weighs the same. It is the same with the rest of the deliciously sweet Double coat TimTams. The thing is, the pack of TimTam was opened at the other end. The last piece of TimTam wouldn't be the last piece if the pack was opened at the last piece end. No TimTam is lesser than the other. They are equal and they are all sweet TimTams.
We are equal in God's eyes, equally the apple of His eye.
Don't ever think you're the lesser last piece. You may be the last piece but you're not anything less.
God is sweeter than millions of TimTams combined!
Thank You, Jesus :)
Last Saturday, realizing that I became bitter somehow freed me. I became honest to God of how I have been feeling, knowing He understood and will always understand. Besides, He knows my heart. He knows me more than I know myself. He sees every corner of my heart but His love remains unchanged. I was scared to be honest with God thinking He'll love me less or leave me alone but that's not God, that's not His character.
And so, God used my discipler to encourage me. God is creative, He used the last piece of TimTam
The last piece of TimTam was at the other end. Being Filipinos, we like to leave the last piece. We don't usually eat the last piece unless prodded. But what's the difference of the last piece of TimtTm with the rest? Nothing. It tastes the same, looks the same, weighs the same. It is the same with the rest of the deliciously sweet Double coat TimTams. The thing is, the pack of TimTam was opened at the other end. The last piece of TimTam wouldn't be the last piece if the pack was opened at the last piece end. No TimTam is lesser than the other. They are equal and they are all sweet TimTams.
We are equal in God's eyes, equally the apple of His eye.
Don't ever think you're the lesser last piece. You may be the last piece but you're not anything less.
God is sweeter than millions of TimTams combined!
Thank You, Jesus :)
Monday, February 4, 2013
little HIGH, little low..hello Highschool!
I know my title is boring and corny but who cares? I want it that way haha
First day of high school put me in a clutter. Who wouldn't? It was my first time studying in a government school and that is not just a school. You have to fight your way through to finish until the end. Before entering, I have heard countless stories of students being kicked out, of hundreds of sleepless nights they have to endure, of thousands of bucks their parents have to spend for a project, of hours and hours straining their neck reading and memorizing or doing homework. It felt to the 13-year old me that the moment I stepped into the school grounds was the moment I stepped in a fun-sipping lair, taking all the fun out from a teenager and imprisoning her to books and geometry and history. (Well, I love/fascinated with history! And biology's my favorite.) I dreaded being suffocated with facts and numbers and equations and signs, and even following me in my dreams. I was used to studying 'til my brain explodes but not being pressured. In short, high school freaked me out.
And so the first day came. I knew a handful of classmates but they were just acquaintances. I remember not talking to my seatmate. We both faced the opposite direction. My classmate near us was laughing at us. Then we were asked to get a small piece of paper (1/8) and to write something I forgot. I handed my seatmate a small paper but we still didn't talk that day. It was hilarious, I tell you. My laughing classmate still remembers it up to this day. That's my only clear memory of my first day.
I remember our multipurpose green skirt. It can be used to sweep and shine the corridor floor or as a dressing room before CAT. You can also use it as a linen to lie on. Or you can use it simply as a skirt. :)
I remember our precious fingers. They are used to take all 10 stones in one hand or do "tuldok" and "around the world" to win the class tournament of Jackstone. They can also hold precious gems to defeat the gruesome opponents in "Pusoy Dos" tournament. I remember our class having a new name, the RP2, short for Republika ng Pusoy 2 because in every corner of the room, you can see students having Pusoy Dos tournament. We even go home late just to finish the tournament. We had this game where my friend had the aces and twos but she still lost (haha!). And of course, we use our fingers to copy endless notes, design our notebooks like a journal, type numbers on calculator or multiply numbers using them, and answer brain-draining exams.
Mini boodle fight was never absent in high school or maybe in my case. When you have food, you share it (even if you don't want to haha). I remember always packing 2 servings for lunch because my classmates would share with my baon. They would sometimes get the best part! haha! There were classmates who would roam around the room collecting viands and they would return to their seat with a fiesta-like lunch on one of the other student's box lid. There's a saying, "When you have a jug, everybody gulps."
First day of high school put me in a clutter. Who wouldn't? It was my first time studying in a government school and that is not just a school. You have to fight your way through to finish until the end. Before entering, I have heard countless stories of students being kicked out, of hundreds of sleepless nights they have to endure, of thousands of bucks their parents have to spend for a project, of hours and hours straining their neck reading and memorizing or doing homework. It felt to the 13-year old me that the moment I stepped into the school grounds was the moment I stepped in a fun-sipping lair, taking all the fun out from a teenager and imprisoning her to books and geometry and history. (Well, I love/fascinated with history! And biology's my favorite.) I dreaded being suffocated with facts and numbers and equations and signs, and even following me in my dreams. I was used to studying 'til my brain explodes but not being pressured. In short, high school freaked me out.
And so the first day came. I knew a handful of classmates but they were just acquaintances. I remember not talking to my seatmate. We both faced the opposite direction. My classmate near us was laughing at us. Then we were asked to get a small piece of paper (1/8) and to write something I forgot. I handed my seatmate a small paper but we still didn't talk that day. It was hilarious, I tell you. My laughing classmate still remembers it up to this day. That's my only clear memory of my first day.
I remember our multipurpose green skirt. It can be used to sweep and shine the corridor floor or as a dressing room before CAT. You can also use it as a linen to lie on. Or you can use it simply as a skirt. :)
I remember our precious fingers. They are used to take all 10 stones in one hand or do "tuldok" and "around the world" to win the class tournament of Jackstone. They can also hold precious gems to defeat the gruesome opponents in "Pusoy Dos" tournament. I remember our class having a new name, the RP2, short for Republika ng Pusoy 2 because in every corner of the room, you can see students having Pusoy Dos tournament. We even go home late just to finish the tournament. We had this game where my friend had the aces and twos but she still lost (haha!). And of course, we use our fingers to copy endless notes, design our notebooks like a journal, type numbers on calculator or multiply numbers using them, and answer brain-draining exams.
Mini boodle fight was never absent in high school or maybe in my case. When you have food, you share it (even if you don't want to haha). I remember always packing 2 servings for lunch because my classmates would share with my baon. They would sometimes get the best part! haha! There were classmates who would roam around the room collecting viands and they would return to their seat with a fiesta-like lunch on one of the other student's box lid. There's a saying, "When you have a jug, everybody gulps."
And there's our sturdy flagpole. We used it as one of the bases in Outan Base / Moro-moro. Moro-moro is one of the class games. It is fun and at the same time, a very serious game. People got injured and went home with abrasions on palms and wrecked jogging pants and blood-stained knees. We also played Marco Polo, Stop!. It is a physical game and needs balance, flexibility, and presence of mind. Yes we smelled awful but who cares? We had fun and the time was ours!
Our minds exercised their creativity in designing our armchairs. Yes, armchairs! During the first week of the school year, we were given time to decorate our armchair. We put pictures, doodled words, covered it with cartolina, glitters, anything we want, then we put plastic cover for protection. Yes, we treasured our armchairs very much!
We also had a reading nook. The back part of our classroom was decorated to look like a mini library. Ours had plant pots and a trailway! We had all sorts of books that we rarely touched any of them for fear that the pages may tear! Most were old books. It was donated by who-know-who. I think we won the contest.
I think that's all for now. There's so much about high school that I want to share but this entry is getting looong!
-to be continued on another entry....hopefully :)
Sunday, February 3, 2013
when nations gather under one Name..
That moment when you witness different nations gather singing praises to God, proclaiming Jesus as Lord and carrying their flags. Words cannot express how you feel and tears just stream down your cheeks. How awesome and big and mighty is our GOD.
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